19 Hilariously Funny Pacifiers for your Baby

I’ve seen funny baby clothes, like the ones in my post about nerdy baby onesies, but what about funny pacifiers? My baby has tons of pacifiers. Most of them are plain, regular ones. I have two that are shaped like bears. It got me wondering what types of hilarious pacifiers are out there. I laughed when I found these hilarious pacifiers and hope you do too!

DISCLAIMER: Mymomsanerd.com is not responsible if your children seek revenge for putting stupid pacifiers in their mouth, up to and including the use of the same pacifiers on you when you are in a nursing home.

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Funny Pacifiers: Lips

Pucker up! Click the image to see more details on Amazon

These lip pacifiers from Amazon looks a lot easier than trying to put lipstick on a baby. Please, don’t put lipstick on your baby.

These would look super cute as a fun decoration on the outside of a baby shower gift!

KISS Demon Tongue

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Your baby will be ready to rock and roll all night… and party ev-er-y day with the Gene Simmons KISS Demon Tongue pacifier from Amazon!

This makes a hilarious gift for any adults who are KISS fans too!

Sadly this pacifier is no longer available.


Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Oh no, a vampire baby (pacifier from Amazon)! I vant to suck your… bottle! We’ll go with that.

Pair this up with a black outfit and a cape, and your little one will have an awesome Halloween costume!

Hilarious facial hair pacifiers

First you had to put up with all of your coworkers terrible beards during no-shave November. And now your baby has facial hair too because there are pacifiers with mustaches (this is just one of the many mustache pacifiers available on Amazon!) on them. What is the world coming to?

Click the image to see more goatee and mustache pacifiers on Amazon

Does your baby look too much like… a baby? Can’t wait for them to grow up? Now everyone will think your kid is Yosemite Sam, a country music legend, police officer, cowboy, or a lumberjack!

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Wait, your baby would rather have a goatee pacifier, not a mustache pacifier? Well there’s a pacifier for that too… (check out the goatee pacifier on Amazon)

Fun animal pacifiers

Yep. There are pacifiers out there for all sorts of animals.

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Is your kid a real pig when it comes to eating (click the link to see the pig pacifier on Amazon)? This would make a super cute Halloween costume too! I have to admit, that pig one freaks me out. It looks like the baby has two noses…

My newborn makes a duck face on her own, she doesn’t need a pacifier for that. She’ll be ready to start taking her own selfies any day now.

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Or inspire your little one to be as quiet as a bunny with this adorable pacifier. (click the link to see the pacifier on Amazon)

Click the image to see more details on Amazon


Speaking of quiet, does the pacifier keep your baby from crying? Well, there’s lots of variations on that theme.

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

First we have the mute button and pull to sound the alarm (click to see on Amazon). I would love to see a pacifier that just has the big “mute” symbol on it, that would be hilarious too!

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

I love this baby volume knob (from Amazon)! It even goes to 11 in case the screaming at your house ever gets that loud!

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

And sometimes you just want to tell your baby to zip it (also from Amazon)!

Pacifiers with silly sayings

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

These make a unique and fun gift for baby boys or any dinosaur lover!

Fresh and Fruity

I love this raspberry pacifier! It might look like any old funny baby pacifier, but the bumpy design also helps soothe babies who are teething! What an awesome idea.

Click the image to see more details on Amazon

Cigar Pacifier

Courtesy of Tony White on Flickr

Sadly, you can’t buy this cigar pacifier, but I wish you could!

The World’s Most Expensive Pacifier

Phew, I’m glad it comes with free shipping. That was really the deciding factor for me!

Yep, you can buy this 14 carat white gold pacifier with 278 diamonds for the bargain price of $17,000! I’m not kidding. Click here to check it out. Read the comments while you’re there too, they’re pretty amazing.


Last but not least…

Sadly, I haven’t found anyone selling this Bane pacifier as seen on Flickr.

Funny Pacifiers FAQs

Where can I buy funny pacifiers?

Amazon is a great place to start! Buy Buy Baby and Etsy have some good ones too!

Are these pacifiers safe for my baby?

Please supervise your baby when using any of these pacifiers. Many of them are large, or heavy. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends leaving the pacifier out of the baby’s mouth once they fall asleep (source).

Can I give one of these pacifiers to my dog?

Yes, but please supervise your dog! The dog could choke on the pacifier or chew it into smaller pieces and swallow them.

What are some funny names for pacifiers?

Dummy (this is what they’re called in the UK!), dirty little secret, faker, fussplug, happiness, mouthpiece, mute button, pipe, plug, pucka (because you pucker up!), the silencer, That-Which-Shall-Not-Be-Named

Do you have any funny baby pacifiers for your kids that I didn’t show here? Let me know in the comments!

This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Jack Demolay

    Mocking a baby with gross adult story (vampires, cigars, vicious teeth, etc.), pacifiers will haunt you when they become teenagers and adults. Which ones would you like to have put in your mouth when they visit you in your nursing home?

  2. Meg

    Probably the vicious teeth one. I think that would be hilarious in a nursing home!
    That is a very good point! I added a disclaimer right after the first picture.

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