My Toddler Won’t Tell Me When He Needs To Go Potty

Potty training is one of the many phases of parenthood that can cause stress and worry. We all want what is best for our children, and potty training is the first real-life skill you will teach your child.

If your toddler struggles to tell you when he needs to go potty, know that this is a normal part of potty training. He is testing the limits and learning about the urge to go — this takes time and practice.

What are signs that a toddler needs to pee?

toddler won't tell me when he needs to go potty

During potty training, you will learn the tell-tale signs that your toddler needs to pee. Most children wiggle or do some version of a potty dance when the urge to urinate is high. They may crouch down, cross their legs, or shift their weight back and forth on each leg.

There are a few other signs that mean your toddler may need to pee. These include:

Tugging on their pants, underwear, or pull-up or grabbing/ pawing at their bottom
Their natural timing, or when they usually go pee (after they wake up, after a meal)
Their face may shift into a smile-grimace that looks like they’re uncomfortable
A pause in what they’re doing

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Is my toddler lying about needing to go potty?

Toddlers are mischievous! If your child struggles to catch on to potty training, he may lie about needing to go potty. Toddlers are intuitive — if you are feeling stressed about the process, he will likely be able to pick up on that.

Try to avoid putting too much pressure on him to go and give him the chance to realize it on his own. If he’s feeling anxious about going, that’s another reason he may lie to avoid the toilet.

The best thing you can do for your toddler during potty training is to be positive, supportive, and patient.

Make trips to the potty fun and engaging, and encourage your child to communicate why he is nervous about going or lying about needing to go.

How can I get my toddler to tell me she needs to go potty?

The more you communicate with your child about the potty, the more open they will be about needing to go.

You can also try talking about why you need to use the potty. Try saying things like, “I just drank a whole glass of water, and I think I need to use the potty now.” or “We’re getting in the car to drive for a while. I think I’m going to use the potty before we leave.”

You can also explain how your bladder feels funny or tingly, putting words to the physical sensation, and teaching your child the action to take in response.

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How often should you ask your toddler to go potty?

If you ask your child if they need to go potty and they say no, respect their answer. Watch for their signs or triggers, and prompt them again.

The amount a potty-trained toddler urinates varies drastically from child to child. You may have potty–trained an older child who used the bathroom like clockwork, but that doesn’t mean this child will be the same.

If they are exhibiting any of the signs listed above, or you just have a general feeling that they need to go, encourage them to break away from whatever activity they’re doing. Often, toddlers refuse to go to the bathroom because they don’t want to stop playing. Once their attention is focused on you, ask them again if they need to go.

The general rule of thumb is to prompt your toddler every 30 minutes to an hour if they need to go, particularly in the early days of potty training when they still rely on you to guide them through the day.

Encourage your child to go to the bathroom when they wake up in the morning, after breakfast, between meals and playtime, before they get in the car, and before bed. These designated potty times will help remind your child to go throughout the day.

WRAP UP – My Toddler Won’t Tell Me When He Needs To Go Potty

Potty training your child is one of the first indications that your baby is growing up. Although they are doing big kid things, they will need your support and guidance throughout the potty training process.

Pay attention to their signs that they need to go potty, and communicate with them as much as possible about going to the bathroom. It’s an entirely new experience for them, which can be exciting and overwhelming. Celebrate the big wins and be supportive during the accidents. Stay consistent, and you’ll see steady but positive changes in their behavior.

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